it’s oh so quiet

it’s so noisy in my house i think i’m going to go insane. there’s never any serenity or quiet except when everyone is gone. they don’t know how to be normal and talk in a normal voice. it’s always yelling and screaming and i hate hate hate. this house will never, ever be like my old one. if you opened the door at my old house, you would hear birds or frogs, depending on the time of day. now? you hear cars and you can’t even see the stars at night. i want to be able to leave my door cracked and hear the things that scurry and sound at night. i want it to be dark and scary outside. i don’t want sirens and loud cars.

i hate my college courses. i missed the first class of algebra that was tonight. i didn’t know it was tonight. i hate being forced to grow up so fast. i just want to be like everyone else and go to high school and take screwoff classes and art classes and have fun. there’s so much pressure on me i feel like crying and crying.

the other day i walked to a thrift store. i wasn’t pleased with anything, so i just walked back home.
here are some pictures:

very pretty… but look at the ugly road. you can’t get away from it.

an old turn of the century house used to be here. it was white with a picket fence, a big tree with a rope and board swing, and trim on the wrap around porch. look at it now. take me away.

i’m broken out all over my face and my hair is falling out in wads. i never see my boyfriend at school and i haven’t plucked my eyebrows. messsss.

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