i feel so bad right now. i’m not sure why. i just feel bad. my room’s a mess, and the stupid repair people are coming tomorrow to work on things in my room bathroom. they always call me to schedule this shit, never my room mate. i always have to be the one to be at home waiting for them to get here.
i just feel like everyone’s ganging up on me for some reason, whether it be i am not doing the iright/i things with my time or money. seems like everyone relies on me for everything. i have half a dozen unfinished projects and just can’t find the time to finish them. i just want my bedroom walls to be covered in cute little photos, like my old room. but i’m not in high school anymore, and don’t have any photos i care to put up anymore. nothing’s cute and little.
i feel dysfunctional and in particular ways i most certainly am. depressing, really. i just want to stop the clock and do what i need to do. and the best anyone can do is give me stupid shit advice like “i’m sure you can find better things to do with your time/money/vagina” yeah i don’t need that either. you don’t know what’s going on.
it just seems like whenever i need to talk about something, everyone runs for the hills. i’m sick of being everyone’s daily mentor if they can’t listen for two goddam seconds or take anything i say seriously. feel free to shove me aside then come sprinting back for friendship like nothing happened. never bothered me before because i am nice, and would hope they’d do the same if i ever needed help. yeah, right. i do things and sometimes hope they’d happen to me some day in return. we’ll see.
thank you have a good day.