hearing: louis armstrong – swing that music | feeling: awake

i went to the doctor’s office and got my insides looked at. first, i had to starve myself for fifteen hours because i had to get blood taken. so finally my name is called, and this really slow nurse leads me down the hallway of death. it’s fifty degrees and she says i have to change into this hospital gown with little boats on it. in my red converse high tops, i struggle to tie the hideous rag shut. the ties didn’t line up, and my left boob kept falling out into the open. vera wang, here i come!.

the room was dark, and they put k-y jelly under my belly button. then they could look inside and i got to see my bladder, cervix, vagina, and ovaries on the big screen! i asked the nurse if i was indeed female.

so i guess things are going to be okay. oh, and in online news, a warning was on the ucf messageboard regarding a psycho messaging people. well, this kid has messaged me on numerous screen names, and has been talking to me on a “normal” one. scary. why are some guys so disgusting?

my aunt gave me a new novel, called the twenties, by edmund wilson. it’s a book of diary entries from the jazz age. i’ve started reading it, and won’t be long before i finish!

and… here’s the culture report!

the new trend is “chipotle” everything. subway, mayonnaise. but they pronounce it wrong. IGNORANT! it’s pronounced “chih-poh-till”, not “chih-poht-lee”. our society? yeah, down the tubes. can’t even pronounce words right on national television.

hot uncle jesse from full house is now doing 10-10-987 commercials. i guess his rock star elvis career never took off.

last night i had the most exciting shopping trip of my life. at target supercenter, that is. matty took me to dinner, and then helped me find spices for the spice rack. but i can’t find a small amount of saffron; and wasn’t ready to spend fifteen bucks for a spice. after we got home, my roommate was having a party, and the place reeked of pot. later, everyone left, so we thought. actually, a guy had passed out in her bathroom, and they left him. he was wandering around my apartment. matt and i told him to leave, and so he went into my room and tried to leave via the closet. PSYCHO.

why did the dell guy have to go to jail? he was so entertaining.

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